Perils of being an ‘Unromantic Wife’


‘Men are from Mars and women are from Venus’, they say. Women and men are considered diagonally opposite when it comes to venting out their feelings. Men are deemed as the ones who rarely express themselves and women are the ones who put themselves out in an unassuming manner and crave for a partner who does the same.

Whenever I meet a group of women and the conversations lead to their respective spouses, the general rant is that their husbands are unromantic who forget their birthdays and anniversaries. During such occasions, I grin and try to look as if I am also one of them and that I am also bitten by the usual ‘unromantic husband syndrome’ like them. But, boy, I am a hopeless actor and somehow they see through my lie. And then I have to admit the truth that in my case it is not my husband who is ‘unromantic’ but it is me. They look at me agape when I tell them that my husband is a thoughtful and sensitive person who has never once forgotten my birthday or our anniversary in the last decade. On top of that he surprises me with gifts and even pen a poem or two to express his love. While they give me an appalling expression of ‘You lucky woman’, I wish I could hide my head in the ground like an ostrich.

Well, you may judge me for being a cold – hearted soul but today I would admit that I am not the quintessential wife who is expressive when it comes to displaying her love.

Now, this is not something which is cringe worthy but when the other half is the one who never ceases to sweep you off your feet with his thoughtful gestures, then you retrospect. Let me first enumerate some instances which will bring out my callousness and non- mushy side:

  • I do not remember buying or giving a bouquet of red roses on Valentine’s Day or birthdays.
  • Gifts? Well, past the dating days, I moved on with the ‘gifting phase’.
  • Cards? I did buy those love-laden Archies cards and even penned many a rhyming verses that did give the man a peek into my heart. But, haven’t done that for a long time now.

So, you get the picture. I am guilty of being the ‘unromantic wife’. Was I like this from the start or it is the outcome of sheer indolence?

I have been married for more than seven years and as time flew by my relationship with my husband became as comforting as an old pair of jeans. It may have borne the tests of time but once worn it fits like a fiddle and becomes as if a part of our skin. So, in the usual humdrums of life, I turned a blind eye to all those gestures of love which break in the monotony of the weary days.

But, fortunately for me, my other half was there to make up for my callousness. But, I have realized that though we may say that, as you grow old there is no need to showcase your emotions to that special someone but doesn’t it feel nice to clearly sketch out to your loved one once in a while that you brighten my days ?

What do you say? Love is what makes the world go round. So it wouldn’t be bad if at times, I keep off the garb of the ‘unromantic wife’ and sprinkle some love.

What say?



About Meha Sharma

Dreamer,Writer,Mother,Fauji wife...all while striving to overcome something called 'Procrastination' :) I dabble in writing and write for @huffpostindia, @womensweb , @mycity4kids. I worked as a Business Analyst in an elite IT firm and as a professor in management colleges. Having earned an MBA degree in Human Resource Management and an MA degree in English Literature, I now pass on my wisdom to management students. To keep my sanity while striving to be a 'decent' mom to my ever inquisitive daughter, I tell myself, what Winnie the Pooh says,"My favourite day is today" :)
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16 Responses to Perils of being an ‘Unromantic Wife’

  1. Balaka says:

    I am also the unromantic wife.. so I can relate to each and every word of your.😂😂

  2. jottingink says:

    Oops !Well at least you know and confessed ☺

  3. Rashmi says:

    Oh you lucky soul, you! Yours looks like a keeper. Hold on tight? 🙂

  4. Ravi S says:

    I believe it is important to reciprocate the feelings of the other at occasions to rekindle the emotions to live the purpose of life that we were put on earth. Love keeps us all alive at the end of the day Mehaji…..

  5. Shalzmojo says:

    Oh I am one overtly romantic perosn and love to do the grand gestures; infact I do them with all my friends/fam regardless of the relationship. I love gifting and enjoy the whole process of selecting one, then wrapping it up and then the small handwritten note – I truly enjoy pampering peeps. I think you should too once in a while, if only to make him wonder what did he do wrong 😉

    • Meha Sharma says:

      Your loved ones are really lucky I must say😊 yes, I agree, everyone likes to be pampered once in a while. I plan to be more expressive from now on.. especially after this confession. Thank you for writing in 😃

  6. Akshata Ram says:

    I was the die hard romantic and loved gifting, surprising and pampering not just my hubby but loved ones. My hubby hardly reciprocates n that’s what has changed my attitude over the years.

  7. Anu says:

    Oh Meha ,you are very lucky woman ☺️☺️ like most of the women I am wife of an unromantic hubby 😊😊 who feels like you.wonderful writing… Specially on the occasion of valentine day… Where I didn’t even get valentine wishes from him… According to him every day is valentine day after marriage (it’s been 9 1/2 years)😊😊

  8. Parul Thakur says:

    You lucky woman 😉
    I loved how you summed the post. I am more romantic one at home but over 12 years of knowing my husband and 7 years of wedding, we are not the ones who buy gifts or plan surprises. The ‘old-jeans’ comfort is us. We are fine with that. I would love a few things here and there but the absence doesn’t bother me. Enjoyed this read!

    • Meha Sharma says:

      I also feel the same that after a certain number of years we tend to get so comfortable with each other that it hardly matters.But, i feel once in a while we should make the other person special. Thank you for writing in 😃

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