The More The Merrier?

It is a universally acknowledged fact that any married woman who has a child ,who has crossed the two year age mark, must/should be looking to procreate another offspring.

As dramatic as the aforesaid statement may seem to you but that is what I have concluded the state of affairs to be since my little one turned three. As much as I love my little girl, she has been a tough child to raise. At the cost of sounding a pessimist, who is forever cribbing as to what a mammoth task is raising a child, I will say that the last three years of my life as a parent were not a joy ride. O fcourse, there were moments of absolute bliss taking shape in the form of a selfless kiss , a clutching your hand for comfort, unbridled peals of laughter, mommy daughter bear hugs and the kinds. But, the hardships too were numerous. It has not been a smooth road. There have been days when my patience level reached its saturation point, when I have asked myself whether I am not good enough a mom for my child.

Then just as my life comes to a sort of normalcy and when I can see an iota of independence creeping in my little girl, I am thwarted with another ‘piece of advice’ from the society at large with pierces my being like a spearhead. The advice that comes to me from all nooks and corners is, “Have a second baby. Your daughter is now three.”

Well, yes my daughter is three plus, yes, she is beginning to be a little independent. But, yes, I do not feel the calling to be a mom yet again. Am I being selfish , as I exempt my kid from the joys of having a sibling? Am I being selfish, if I feel that I feel that I would not do justice to the second kid (if I have one), as I would be frustrated and the brunt of which would be borne by the children. Am I being selfish, if I feel that I should now do something for myself , after taking a break to be with my first born round the clock?

Well, the dilemma of whether to have a second child or not is something which moms like me are faced with and most of the times we succumb to the pressure. I feel that, though it is indeed wonderful for your child to have a sibling, it is equally imperative for the parents, most significantly the mother( as we have to literally give birth to a new life) to be absolutely certain of what she wants. It is not that if your child is nurtured sibling less, he will turn out to be a loner, as is generally professed.

So, it is you and only you who should take the call. After all raising a child is the most difficult job in the world. Isn’t it?

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About Meha Sharma

Dreamer,Writer,Mother,Fauji wife...all while striving to overcome something called 'Procrastination' :) I dabble in writing and write for @huffpostindia, @womensweb , @mycity4kids. I worked as a Business Analyst in an elite IT firm and as a professor in management colleges. Having earned an MBA degree in Human Resource Management and an MA degree in English Literature, I now pass on my wisdom to management students. To keep my sanity while striving to be a 'decent' mom to my ever inquisitive daughter, I tell myself, what Winnie the Pooh says,"My favourite day is today" :)
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